it generally takes me about a year, from a lingering look across a room, to conversations that you remember every scrap of. answers you parse and re-analyse, and sudden bloomings of the heart at a perceived response. and through it all i fight myself.
there weren't many of them, these guilty secrets. weaknesses i would rather die than reveal. yet the keeping them almost tore me apart.
soon it will be a year. i hope that i can leave it behind, like those dusty bags in the lost luggage rooms in hundreds of railway stations
airports
bus stations
packed full of memories meaningless without their owners
objects purposeless without the lives that gave them consequence.
but you gave me something that i hope will last, and i hope that perhaps, in my own lesser way, i have been some force for good in your life. perhaps
i was some solace in those darker moments
but you won't remember them, now that the dawn has broken.
self-affirmation, so elusive. how can you run from doubting yourself?
there weren't many of them, these guilty secrets. weaknesses i would rather die than reveal. yet the keeping them almost tore me apart.
soon it will be a year. i hope that i can leave it behind, like those dusty bags in the lost luggage rooms in hundreds of railway stations
airports
bus stations
packed full of memories meaningless without their owners
objects purposeless without the lives that gave them consequence.
but you gave me something that i hope will last, and i hope that perhaps, in my own lesser way, i have been some force for good in your life. perhaps
i was some solace in those darker moments
but you won't remember them, now that the dawn has broken.
self-affirmation, so elusive. how can you run from doubting yourself?
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